My mother passed away on June 23rd, 2020 at the age of 74.
She was a lovely woman and I will miss her dearly.
Below is what I said at her service:
I wasn’t expecting to speak today. My brother Nigel sent out a note to the family asking if anyone wanted to share a story about our mother for his talk. So, I sent him one that had particular meaning for me and he then asked if I wanted to read it at her service.
He felt it tied in well with the remarks he was going to make and wanted to know if I would share it personally.
The memories of my mom that stick out to me are not the major or excitable ones. I certainly have fond memories of special occasions like holidays and celebrations. However, the ones that stay with me are quiet moments.
You see my mom was a quiet woman. And by that I don’t mean that she didn’t like to talk or joke or have fun. She loved to laugh. Did you know that when something really amused her she would snort a little when she laughed? She was always a little embarrassed by that.
I found it endearing.
To me, she was quiet in that she was thoughtful and observant and was really good at letting us kids be ourselves, without judgement or interference. Unless we really needed a talking to and then she would let us know!
So, I would like to share with you one story. A short quiet moment with my mom.
One day we were sitting on the patio and I was sketching. I enjoyed drawing. It was at her mom’s house, in Trinidad. She mentioned that she used to draw too. I didn’t know that about her. I had never seen her do it so I asked if she would draw something for me.
She said yes so, I gave her the sketchbook and pencil that she bought for me. She started to sketch a house across the street.
While she was drawing we chatted about how she really liked drawing but didn’t have a lot of time anymore to do it. I suppose having four kids, working and providing for them will do that.
When she finished, she showed me what she had done and I was amazed. I wasn’t amazed because I was just a kid and didn’t know what a good drawing was. I was amazed because she was really talented and I had no idea and that we shared a love for it.
I’ll never forget that moment because, I now realize that she was a person who had put aside something she loved because she was needed somewhere else. She set drawing aside and put herself second to her family and taking care of them.
I would like to think that she drew again. That she found the time to do that other thing she loved. But if not, I hope she at least knew that she inspired me to keep doing something that I loved.
I love her and, will miss her and, those quiet moments together.